Somewhere in history, a man named Royal Burpee invented an exercise that involves going from standing to the floor and back up again, repeatedly, at speed, for reasons that have never been fully explained to our satisfaction. And we've been meaning to address that.
So we did. In a letter. On a shirt.
"Dear Mr. Burpee" is the formal complaint that everyone who's ever been told to drop and give twenty has wanted to file. It's polite. It's measured. It makes a reasonable counter-proposal involving armchairs and television. It is, frankly, a more constructive response to the burpee than most of us have managed in the moment., which usually involves just a groan and some labored breathing.
But here's the thing. You know what a burpee is because you've done one. Probably more than one. Probably in a class where someone enthusiastic counted them down out loud. And you did it, while they just stood there and counted, BTW.
So while the letter stands, and the grievance is real, you still showed up. You still burped... er, burpee'd. Good for you.
- A handwritten formal complaint to the inventor of the burpee, printed on a shirt, as it deserves to be
- Proposes a reasonable alternative movement involving an armchair and a remote control
- Unisex relaxed fit for everyone recovering from, dreading, or currently mid-burpee
- Soft, breathable fabric, because at least something about your workout should be comfortable
- Perfect gift for anyone who has ever made direct eye contact with a trainer and silently communicated I hate this
